What If?

Mentioned in a previous post were the seemingly inevitable "what if" factors. Through the past seven months, almost every possible question has popped into my head at one point or another.

What if I tear it again somehow?
What if this activity is putting too much stress on the ligament?
What if it doesn't fully heal?
What if I don't return to normal?
What if I didn't complete part of the recovery correctly?

I have never handled "gray areas" well because I would much rather have definitive answers. But with this particular injury and recovery, nothing is certain. Everyone's body is different, meaning every body will respond to the reconstruction differently. At first, it was hard for me to understand that. I was constantly on Google researching others who have went through the TJ process and comparing myself to how they felt. I would feel on and around the incision site searching for tenderness or soreness. Looking back, all this did was provide unneeded stress. The solution to ending the mental "games" was very simple.

Any time I have a question, I ask it. Any time I feel something unusual in my elbow, I make sure I am honest about it. Talking to my physical therapist has been my biggest sense of stress relief. Openness and honesty help me understand the recovery, such as what to be concerned with and not to be concerned with. For example, in the beginning, whenever I felt a small pain or soreness in my elbow, my mind immediately turned to the thought of tearing the ligament again. In the back of my mind, I knew it was not a logical thought, but it seemed realistic having just come off the surgery. Through conversation with my PT, I am now able to distinguish the irregularities. 99% of the time, these naturally come about due to the extensiveness of different exercises.

Just as importantly, I have stayed off of the internet. My recovery, like all others, is unique to me and my body. I may not run into issues that others come across. Above all, I am healthy! I am over seven months into the rehab without encountering a single major setback. It took me up until recently to wrap my mind around it, but once I did, I have not looked back.

Bottom line, the "what if" questions are never going to become anything more than questions. I've found ways to alter my thinking, allowing only positivity.

Throwing (Week 3)

Week three consisted of Step 7 and Step 8 (repeated for two days). No issues came about and my elbow feels 100%!

Step 7
10 throws @ 45 feet
25 throws @ 60 feet
Rest 10 minutes
10 throws @ 45 feet
10 throws @ 60 feet
25 throws @ 75 feet
A few throws were across my body, but it was the first time stretching out to 75 feet and it was easily corrected.

Step 8 (Day One)
10 throws @ 45 feet
10 throws @ 60 feet
25 throws @ 75 feet
Rest 10 minutes
10 throws @ 45 feet
10 throws @ 60 feet
25 throws @ 75 feet
No issues!

Step 8 (Day Two)
10 throws @ 45 feet
10 throws @ 60 feet
25 throws @ 75 feet
Rest 10 minutes
10 throws @ 45 feet
10 throws @ 60 feet
25 throws @ 75 feet
Slightly increased effort with each throw, elbow responded nicely.

This week will cover Steps 9, 10, and 11.